La Connerie: Fake Worn Camera

Bonjour, tout le monde! Es-tu un “poseur“? A poseur (poser) is someone who fakes his credentials to gain respect. He will try to wear expensive clothes to impress people or claim to be someone that he isn’t. I do not think it’s always a bad thing because we all have fantasies of our own, whatever they are. I sometimes imagine myself as a buff plumber giving assistance to a helpless housewife. We are all free to live up our own fantasies. There’s always a child inside of us, and this goes with photography as well. You can live an illusion all you want and it can sometimes be temporary so you can get back to your normal life when it’s convenient. We should never do anything permanent until we are in the right mindset. Today, I will show you how to live your wildest dreams, that is if you want to fantasize about being a press photographer.

Introduction:

Many people purchase cameras based on how they look and feel in their hands, these are accessories as much as they are tools. A lot of people buy black Leicas (or other black classic cameras) because of how they look when they are worn and weathered. Unfortunately, that worn look takes plenty of time and lots of handling just to get the brass parts underneath peeking out, and even more time and handling just so the patina will look just right. Some people don’t have the time and patience for that, so they cheat it by using sandpaper or denim to permanently wear the paint down. The result looks fake as fuck, but so are they. I will show you in this article an alternative way so you won’t fall into this foolishness, what’s better is it’s all temporary and you can clean it off anytime. It will also work on plastic parts, too!

This is the result that I got after spending not more than 10 minutes of faking the look of a worn camera. Do you think it looks convincing? I don’t think so but it can fool somebody looking from a meter or more.

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Repair: W-Nikkor 3.5cm f/2.5 (late)

Hello, everybody! Do you know about the song “Somewhere Over the Rainbow“? I’m pretty sure you have heard of it in one form or another. The original song came from the “Wizard of Oz” movie in 1939 which has Judy Garland in it. It has since been covered in different languages and by different singers, some are famous while some are unknowns. However, the best known version today is the version sang by the late Israel Kamakawiwoʻole, a huge mountain of a man with a sweet voice and a ukulele. I personally prefer his version over the rest because I felt it has more depth in it despite being simpler. A recent cover is at times better since the original song, it has happened several times. The topic of this article is something similar in the sense that it’s the last known version of a popular line of lenses. It’s also the best in terms of looks and ergonomics as it has benefited from several years of previous refinements. Read this article to know about this beautiful lens.

Introduction:

The W-Nikkor 3.5cm f/2.5 has gone through several iterations, what I’ll showcase today is the last one to come out of the factory. Nobody knew exactly when its production started or ended but this came out in the final years of the Nikon rangefinder era around 19591960. The optical formula remained the same, it is the barrel that’s new this time. The design of the barrel looks similar to the W-Nikkor 3.5cm f/1.8 so the aperture values are much easier to see and the barrel is much lighter compared to the older ones since it is now made from aluminum alloy instead of brass. In my opinion, this is the best version of this lens. The ergonomics alone is worth the extra price and rarity of this little gem.

The barrel looks very beautiful and modern compared to the older versions of this lens. It is easier to see the numbers now that the barrel is colored black and the letters are in white. The knurling also helps a lot so your hands will not slip and it also makes it easier to recognize which barrel you’re operating.

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Repair: Nikkor-S.C 5cm f/1.4 (Early)

Hello, everybody! Do you know about the Uyghurs? They are a Turkic people living in East Turkistan which is called Xinjiang by the CCP Chinese. They are a proud people with a long and profound history. They are culturally different from the rest of communist China, because they are not part of the Han majority. They are closer to the Uzbeks, Turks and other Central Asians. Their way of life is threatened and many of them have fled to other countries as they are being persecuted, much like the Tibetans. This is to say that not all people who live in communist China are all “Chinese“, some are cultural minorities who have their distinct way of life that’s in danger of being wiped out. Today, we’ll talk of something along those lines. It’s a lens that looks similar the rest of the family, but it’s certainly different in small ways. It is important to make a distinction so we will know exactly what’s in front of us.

Introduction:

The Nikkor-S•C 5cm f/1.4 is one of the lenses that I have covered many times in this site. Many of you got familiar with it through my articles. I did not think that I would ever write another article about it, but here I am presenting you with another one. This time it’s an early version from the first part of 1950. This is the coveted “5005” series, the earliest production of the Nikkor-S•C 5cm f/1.4. This particular lens is from the 2nd batch which has less digits in the serial number, but still valuable compared to common later versions that everybody has. These are valuable because some people consider them as “Made in Occupied Japan“. While it’s technically not an “MIOJ” lens due to the lack of the engraved country of origin, the date it was manufactured should put this together with the other genuine “MIOJNikkors. This is only important for a certain group of collectors, whatever its true nature should be.

The barrel is similar to the more common later version except for a few minor differences such as the different typeface used, along with being somewhat heavier. The last version (in black) is the lightest, it has many parts that are made of a lighter alloy.

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Repair: Nikkor S•C 8.5cm f/1.5 (S-mount)

Hello, everybody! Do you love blue cheese? I love it a lot and I eat it almost everyday. My favorite is made by the Danes, le Danablu or Bleu Danois. It’s not as stinky as Roquefort and it’s a bit dryer so it crumbles. It stinks just as well so the general taste and texture is slightly similar despite not being moist. There’s a lot of different varieties of blue cheeses, I hope to taste them all one day. How about you, do you like eating blue cheese? How do you like it with? Speaking of the differences between French and Danish cheeses, I’ll showcase something that came in different versions. You can think of it as Danablu and Roquefort in some ways because it’s essentially the same thing but they come in different flavors.

Introduction:

The Nikkor S•C 8.5cm f/1.5 is a legendary portrait lens for many Nikon shooters. Many people dreamed of owning one of these back in the day as it is today. It’s the Nikkor available for the Nikon rangefinder, and also for the whole company as well up until the introduction of the Nikkor 85mm f/1.4 Ai-S which is some 28 years after this one came out. I have written another article about this lens in Leica mount, so please go and see that article to find out more about its history and some other tests that I have done. We will only talk about what’s different in this article.

The all-metal barrel is robust, and feels substantial when held. You will never get anything like this today, especially from the CCP (Cheap Chinese Products). Everything feels precise and it’s nothing short of total luxury.

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Repair: Nikkor-S 50mm f/1.4 (Olympic)

Hello, everybody! The recent Olympics has been controversial, we are even discussing some of the topics to this day and for many days to come. Some find it amusing well some people were offended. Some say it was done in poor taste, while some people claim that it points to the next step in human psychology. I do not dare to make such bold claims because I am merely a camera repair enthusiast. But this is what I can say, we can all agree that some parts of the event left us scratching our heads. To me, it was the huge disrespect by the Australian “dancer” to her sport. In this website, we do not disrespect anything related to Nikon. In order to wash away the trauma, I will present to you another “Olympic“, one that is hailed by many as a masterpiece and the best there is, even to this day. Let’s all celebrate and enjoy the “Olympic“.

Introduction:

The Nikkor-S 50mm f/1.4 (Olympic) was made in 1964 under a limited batch of less than 1700 units. It’s even rarer than Nikkor-S 50mm f/1.4 (Millennium) that is a reproduction of this lens. That year is special because of the Summer Olympics hosted by Japan. Many companies saw that as a chance to showcase their prowess by manufacturing exceptional products to be used for covering the games. Nikon made a couple of such projects, the lens you see here is one of them. It’s also the last lens ever mean by Nikon for the Nikon S rangefinder system that isn’t a reproduction. Many people consider this to be the best 50mm Nikkor of its kind because of how well it performs technically, it’s surprisingly good even at f/1.4. That’s a big departure from what many people were used to with the older Nikkor-S•C 5cm f/1.4, which renders a lot differently because it’s considered to be “soft” when shot at larger apertures; that’s just the case when shooting with Sonnar-type lenses. Speaking of which, this is the only 50/1.4 rangefinder Nikkor that isn’t a copy or derivative of the famed Sonnar design.

This is by far the largest rangefinder 50/1.4 Nikkor ever made. It is longer and considerably wider than the older Nikkor-S.C 5cm f/1.4, and it’s heavier, too. The barrel is all-metal so it feels great when you hold it. A lighter type of alloy is used on some parts in order to make it weigh less so it feels a bit different when it’s held. This is in contrast to the older lenses which uses brass.

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Repair: Cine-Zoom-Nikkor 17-70mm f/2.2

Hello, everybody! Do you know the song “Ame no Midosuji” (雨の御堂筋) by the famous singer that came from the country of Taiwan called Ouyang Fei Fei (歐陽菲菲)? It’s about a woman who is searching for her lover in a rainy night. She went on looking for him but in despair she found nobody, and just me do with her memories of him. We have all searched for something in our lives, but sometimes we never get to find some of them. Unlike Ouyang Fei Fei, I have found something that I was looking for, and it came to me as a beautiful surprise. It’s one of the rarest Nikkors ever made and I will show you what I found today.

Introduction:

The Cine-Zoom-Nikkor 17-70mm f/2.2 is one of the few Cine-Zoom Nikkors that’s seen in catalogs, it’s still a mystery even to knowledgeable historians and collectors. Nobody knew when it was made and for how long but I suspect is that it was sold as early as 1959 or 1963. Nobody knew when production stopped so I cannot even speculate. It’s a very mysterious lens and I will try my best to give you the most up-to-date information I could find, including some sample photos and a complete teardown of this lens.

Its construction and all-metal build are outstanding, definitely the best of all Cine-Nikkors. It’s also heavy, so I get nervous just thinking about how much stress the threads of the mount must endure when this is fitted to a movie camera and used for a long span of time.

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Repair: Nikkor-Q•C 13.5cm f/3.5 (F-mount Adapter)

Hello, everybody! I just bought a DNA testing kit, you know, the one that’s hip with the kids these days. I bought it because I wanted to know what are my health risks because I’m not young anymore. I did not get one because I want to avoid accidentally banging my relatives like what some people actually think and do for themselves. I’m also curious to know if I have relatives around the world, maybe I will find an uncle living nearby that I have never ever heard of, isn’t that exciting? Speaking of finding secret relatives and genealogy, I would like to share with you a “secret relative” of the Nikkor 135/3.5 family. It is not well known so it might as well be an urban legend for some people but we will know everything about it here in this article.

Introduction:

This adapter for Nikkor-Q•C 13.5cm f/3.5 will enable you to use the front barrel of the lens and mount it to any camera that uses the Nikon F-mount. It was made for a short time to coincide with the release of the legendary Nikon F. Not a lot of people knew about it and it’s only ever mentioned in the catalogs. It isn’t really a proper “lens” so to speak because it was ever only sold as a separate item as far as I know.

It is much shorter compared to its rangefinder cousins. It’s because the F-mount requires a longer flange distance in order to stay clear of the flapping mirror. While the construction is all-metal, the adapter feels somewhat “cheap” because the bayonet mount is part of the lower barrel. While it keeps things simple, it gives the impression of cheapness like what I have just mentioned.

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Repair: Nikkor-Q.C 13.5cm f/3.5 (Exakta)

Hello, everybody! Have you ever been duped into thinking that something might be fake? You pass it and regret later after finding out that it’s probably the best bargain you could ever find. It has happened a lot with some of my friends who collect expensive watches. It has happened to me several times before, but I am more lucky than stupid so I am usually blessed with good deals. Today, I will show you one such lucky find, a real find of a lifetime. In all my years hunting for rare items I have ever only seen and touched 2 of these. Please read the whole article to know why this is so special.

Introduction:

The Nikkor-Q.C 13.5cm f/3.5 featured in this article is a special one, it is one of the very few existing lenses that Nikon made that came with an Exakta-mount. Only a few people have knowledge of its existence and even fewer people have ever seen one in person. I am extremely lucky to own such a rare oddity. Nobody knew exactly how many of these were made, we can only date them by their serial numbers. My example is probably from 1954.

Compared to the usual ones that came with a rangefinder mount, this one is quite short. It has to be since the Exakta is an SLR, complete with a flapping mirror. You may easily assume that this was modified using a talented specialist shop at first glance but the quality is so consistent that it can only come from Nikon. I almost dismissed it when I first saw this, singing it’s a fake.

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Repair: Voigtländer Bessa R (Part 2)

Hello, everybody! Because of the generous support that I got from all of you, I am motivated to finish this series earlier than scheduled. I’m not saying that I am like a jukebox that will only play whenever a coin is inserted, but a little bit of donation makes me feel that my contribution to the community is welcomed. It has been many years since I have started this website and this is one of the few instances where everyone seems to so eager to see the final part of a series. Your prayers have been answered, this article will be the best resource for this camera around in the internet unless someone else will be able to write something better. If you’re content creator, please don’t rip my content off. If you must, at least help advertise for me and leave me a little tip, that will be very much appreciated. It’s fair for me to ask.

Introduction:

The Voigtländer Bessa R is a quirky camera, but it’s very popular. There’s many people who have had the bad luck of owning lemons just because of how it was constructed. In this case, popularity does not mean reliability. You will know why I made the statement in this article. Despite having a bad reputation for its reliability, some people have been lucky with their cameras so it’s not entirely the camera’s fault. It’s still a great camera, all you need to do is inspect the camera very well before buying one and ask for a warranty. That should give you enough time to run a few rolls through it.

I am somewhat disappointed at the amount of plastics used within the camera. I could accept it having a plastic exterior but seeing plastic used in some of the important parts inside the camera turned me off. It is ironic because it’s not the plastic parts that will give in first, what some of the metal parts.

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Repair: Voigtländer Bessa R (Part 1)

Hello, everybody! Do you believe in curses? Some folks believe that items can be cursed, it can come from the previous owner or just a stroke bad luck. You’ll sometimes wonder why things are always in a messed up state or why they’re always broken. The good thing is, curses can be lifted by good karma, faith or the patience of a good healer. Today, I will show you a cursed camera. It has been featured on the internet for a couple of years now, with the owner desperate to find a way of lifting the curse. It’s destiny that brought me and the camera together. Do you think I have enough good karma to lift the curse of the evil jammed shutter? I have been saving cameras and lenses for years, along with presenting you the best articles you can find on the internet. Let’s see if all that goodness will change the fate of this poor thing.

Introduction:

The Voigtländer Bessa R was sold from 2000 up to 2004, it was preceded by a minimalistic model called the Voigtländer Bessa L which doesn’t come with a viewfinder nor a rangefinder. It’s a brave gamble by a small company relative to the giants of the time called Nikon and Canon. The company is named Cosina, a company with a long history and experience. They dared to sell a concept that went against what the market was used to, the effort resulted in an instant classic that spawned a whole line of cameras. Many people are attracted to these because they offer something unique and that not a lot of brands give. It’s still very popular these days and the price has shot up due to the hype from influencers. I will show you if this hype is deserved or not in this series, you will be the judge of it.

This is the most modern LTM camera you can ever buy. It has a lot of modern conveniences which helps in simplifying the process of taking great photos. It is a great “Sunday camera” for leisurely taking photos at a park or the streets. It offers the best in terms of comfort of all the LTM cameras I have ever used.

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